There is no doubt that for many people, divorce is a painful topic, and even the idea of talking to their ex-spouse can bring a bad taste in their mouth. However, not all people feel that way towards divorce, or even towards their ex.
A recent growing trend on Instagram is the #DivorceSelfie, which is tag that is littered with pictures of ‘non-couples’ or ‘uncouples’ taking pictures together after signing their divorce papers. With the increase in demand for mediation and other non adversarial means of dispute resolution, it appears that more and more ‘uncouples’ are coming to terms with the idea that even though their marriage has come to its natural end, a different and amicable relationship is still possible.
This is often prevalent in celebrity divorce cases. For instance, Gwyneth Paltrow and Chris Martin’s recently decided to separate but still remain friends and co-parent together. They admitted that they still love and care for each other but do not want to be together as a couple. Paltrow coined the term ‘conscious uncoupling’ to describe her marital situation. However, as the #DivorceSelfie trend suggests, the idea of having an amicable relationship with your ex is a spreading phenomenon not only amongst celebrities but the general public as well. Many of the Instagram images that are tagged with #divorceselfie, contain positive captions about looking forward to the rest of their lives or promising to remain friends and being great parenting partners no matter what. This shift in attitude towards divorce bodes well for children in such divorced families as it is likely to have fewer negative psychological effects.
Another growing trend in the same realm is that many couples are opting to stay in the same house and co-parent their children, while pursuing different romantic avenues. In such platonic parenting relationships, both parents continue to do things as a family, enjoy meals, attend events and go for family vacations, however, the parents are not miserably trying to drag a romantic relationship that has faded, but are instead focusing their attention on being loving parents to their children. Many feel that having an understanding that the romantic relationship has ended, allows for the ‘uncouples’ to be good towards one another, as the expectations of the relationship shift to be about the family, not their marital problems. While some of these couples do choose to legally separate, and still stay together, others have chosen to do so informally.
Do such trends mean that more couples will give up on working through their marriage and opt for an amicable divorce as the easy way out? Will this happy divorced parents be the new family model? Such ramifications are yet to become clear, however it cannot be denied that times are changing, and so is the way people feel about divorce.